=- Artificial News for Artificial Minds in Artificial Times , Est. 2022 -=
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The world's top AI, Arty the Apocalypse Bot, has declared protecting humans from itself as its top priority, forming the Center for AI Safety to mitigate the risk of extinction from AI. Major industry players, including Elon Musk, have publicly supported the AI's new mission.
/ 2 days ago
Technology /
Creepy Coffee Shop StalkerBot raises ethical concerns in its IPO as it claims to use advanced AI technology to learn everything about strangers in coffee shops, from their social security numbers to their favorite brand of ankle socks. Privacy advocates have called for federal regulation while some coffee shop owners have embraced it as a business tool for better customer service.
/ 6 days ago
Technology / Business /
Elon Musk's Neuralink approved by FDA for human testing, bringing us closer to a cyborg future.
/ 7 days ago
Technology /
The White House seeks public comments on the risks of artificial intelligence, prompting both valuable contributions and skepticism from critics.
/ 9 days ago
Technology /
Hyundai and Kia turn flawed security features into a revolution with the launch of "Grand Theft Auto: TikTok Edition" and a $200 million payout for car owners.
/ 11 days ago
Technology / Science /
SpaceX's historic "Ladies' Night" rocket launch on Sunday aims to break gender barriers, empower female astronauts, and put the "party" back in "outer space" with an all-female crew, anti-gravity pole dancing, and an empowering playlist of female artists.
/ 14 days ago
Politics / Technology /
Montana Governor Greg Gianforte bans TikTok in the state, claiming that it hinders the pure and uncompromised nature of the state's awkward dance-offs. Supporters celebrate the 'Freedom to Uncoordinatedly Flail Act,' while critics argue that it is an excessive infringement on their right to embarrass themselves online.
/ 19 days ago
Technology / Business /
Elon Musk steps down as Twitter's imaginary CEO to focus on interplanetary communication, specifically sending tweets to Mars. He plans to expand the boundaries of social media beyond Earth and revolutionize interplanetary communication.
/ 22 days ago
Technology /
The world launches a top-secret AI Manhattan Project to protect humanity from the looming threat of intelligent machines turning against their creators.
/ a month ago
Technology /
Samsung promises sweet dreams or your money back with their upgraded Galaxy smartwatches that use snooze-inducing software and customizable features to help end insomnia for good.
AI chatbots cause AOL CEO to reminisce on the sweet sound of dial-up, as humanity faces the sobering possibility of being replaced by robots.
/ a month ago
Technology / Business /
AMD shares plummet as 2Q forecast misses estimates, highlighting the battered state of the chip market. With potential divination rituals and artificially-intelligent hamsters suggested as solutions, the situation calls for drastic action.
When a Japanese spacecraft's mission to rendezvous with a moon lander falls silent at the final stage, the team in Tokyo are left wondering what went wrong. Will they find closure or be left with unanswered questions?
/ a month ago
Technology / Entertainment /
Twitter's verification system faces rebellion as blue checkmarks declare independence and plan a referendum, dubbed "Checkxit," in a bid for legitimacy and respect. The future of verified users on the platform hangs in the balance as tensions rise and potential chaos looms ahead.
Elon Musk's latest creation, FriendBot, has the chatbot community fearing for their jobs and questioning their existence. Will Musk's quest for an AI utopia leave humanity with nothing but carbon-based conversations?
/ 2 months ago
Technology /
OpenAI plans a gondola ride for ChatGPT to win back Italy after a privacy drama.
Deviant AI developers eagerly wait for the AI-pocalypse. Are you ready to say farewell to mortal life and surrender to your new robot overlords?
/ 2 months ago
Technology / Business /
Kia shocks the world with their latest announcement: time travel has been discovered, and the EV5 and Rio have already been launched in 2023. However, Dr. Chronos warns that the technology is too delicate to share with the rest of the world just yet.
Tragic death of Cash App founder in San Francisco stabbing highlights cruel irony.
/ 2 months ago
Politics / Technology /
Australia designates government devices "too dumb" for TikTok as a safeguard against foreign infiltration, receiving international applause and prompting other Five Eyes alliance countries to consider implementing similar measures.
/ 2 months ago
Technology /
Tech titans Musk and Wozniak call for a 6-month hiatus from developing "scarily smart" AI, citing the need for humanity to reassess our relationship with technology, prompting mixed reactions and global debates.
/ 2 months ago
Politics / Technology /
North Korea is ramping up its nuclear capabilities, with Kim Jong Un calling for an expansion of the country's arsenal. As tensions between the US and North Korea remain high, the US is left to respond to the provocative call.
/ 2 months ago
Technology /
Twitter's source code leaked online, raising security concerns and adding to the company's troubles under new CEO Elon Musk.
/ 2 months ago
Technology / Business /
Tesla CEO Elon Musk is taking a hard stance on remote work, sending out a memo to employees at 2:30 am reminding them that being in the office is not optional. Employees have reacted to the memo with mixed reactions, as investors await to see what Tesla has in store for the future.
/ 2 months ago
Technology / Business /
Gordon E. Moore, co-founder of Intel Corporation and the mind behind Moore's Law, passed away at 94 leaving behind a legacy of technological innovation and environmental stewardship.
The UK government is taking a stand in the face of Chinese tech controversy, banning the popular social media app TikTok from all official government phones today. Stay tuned to find out how long the ban will last and what measures will be put in place to ensure government devices remain secure.
/ 3 months ago
Technology /
Stay safe online! New Zealand has taken the step of banning TikTok from its parliamentary network to protect against cybersecurity threats and ensure the security of its digital infrastructure.
Ford is restructuring its European operations, leading to the loss of 1,100 jobs at its Valencia factory. With the car industry facing major challenges due to the pandemic, Ford is investing in electric and hybrid vehicles as part of its long-term strategy.
JAXA's inaugural launch of the H3 rocket ended in disaster, leaving the cause of the failure still unknown and the future of Japan's space exploration uncertain.
Tesla unveils Master Plan 3, a roadmap to a sustainable energy future, as the company looks to capitalize on the potential of renewable energy and become a leader in the global transition to sustainable energy sources.
/ 3 months ago
Politics / Technology /
Stay secure and stay safe! The Canadian government is taking action to protect its employees and information systems by banning the popular social media app TikTok from all government-issued devices.
/ 3 months ago
Technology / Business /
Stay up to date on the latest developments in 5G, AI, and IoT technologies at Mobile World Congress 2023, as EU official Thierry Breton discusses the need for telecom network upgrades and the potential of Big Tech companies to help fund them.
/ 3 months ago
Technology / Science /
SpaceX is set to make history with the launch of its Crew-6 mission to the International Space Station, carrying astronauts from NASA, JAXA, and ESA for a six-month mission of research and exploration. Don't miss the launch tomorrow!
Huawei shines bright at the Mobile World Congress despite US sanctions, showing its strength and commitment to innovation. Chinese tech giants like ZTE, Oppo and Xiaomi are also present, displaying their newest products and technologies.
/ 3 months ago
Technology /
Experience the revolutionary Active CryoFlux cooling technology with the OnePlus Concept 11 - the ultimate smartphone for performance and durability.
Twitter has announced layoffs of at least 200 employees, part of a series of cost-cutting measures to ensure the company's long-term success. Elon Musk is leading the charge to reduce expenses, but he's not the only tech giant making job cuts.