In an unexpected turn of events that has left billions of Earthlings scratching their heads, NASA finally decided to get serious about its "rescue" mission for two astronauts who have been stuck on the International Space Station (ISS) for a cozy nine months. A Falcon 9 rocket, the kind of spacecraft that looks like a giant cucumber strapped to a firework, blasted off from Florida last Friday. This thrilling launch, which took place at 7:03 PM local time, was immediately followed by a barrage of "Can we just send them pizza instead?" memes from social media users who are apparently unaware of the complexities of space travel. The mission, which NASA has dubbed "Help! We Finally Remembered Our Astronauts," is supposed to bring a four-member crew to the ISS. Upon arrival, they will spend the first half-hour trying to remember how exactly to turn off the ISS’s Wi-Fi so they can send back desperate tweets asking for a ride home. "We celebrate the countless individuals all over the world that have made this journey possible," shouted astronaut Nichole, who is probably wondering why they hadn’t packed a little more cash for takeout options in orbit. In the meantime, the astronauts on board have developed several innovative survival strategies to cope with their unexpected extended stay, including a deep dive into the ISS’s Netflix library. Sources claim the team has swiftly binged everything from "Stranger Things" to educational documentaries about janitorial supplies in space. "It’s been a real eye-opener," said one of the stranded astronauts, presumably while donning an ISS-branded bathrobe. Back on Earth, critics have expressed their dissatisfaction with the way NASA has handled the situation. “Nine months? I can't even wait nine minutes for my Chipotle!” said one prominent political figure who probably doesn’t understand suborbital flights. Yet others are trying to lightheartedly pitch in by starting a “Get Them Home” crowdfunding campaign, with rewards including $5 personalized “Welcome Back” banners and $1000 VIP hugs from random strangers. As the crew swap mission continues, the space community is buzzing with excitement and conflicting opinions. Some are calling for an immediate "bring them home" operation, while others advocate for sending more snacks instead, fearing the astronauts may still be hungry after nine months without a decent meal. Either way, esteemed scientists continue to remind the nation that this is "an important step in humanity's quest to explore other planets and keep people from hanging out in low Earth orbit indefinitely." As the days tick down and the launch date approaches, only one question remains: Will those brave astronauts come back with a long list of demands for better communication protocols with mission control, or will we finally find out what happens when you leave two humans alone in a tin can with floating snacks for too long? Stay tuned, folks!