In a stunning turn of events that has left political pundits scratching their heads and interns scrambling for the nearest cardboard box, the White House hosted its first-ever “Lost and Found: The Great Administration Swap Meet” this past weekend. The event, advertised as a cross between an estate sale and a yard sale from a particularly avant-garde neighbor, attracted a surprisingly large crowd of senators, aides, and even a few confused tourists who happened to stumble onto the South Lawn while searching for the bathroom. Upon arrival, attendees were greeted by the sight of tables overflowing with dubious items that held deep significance—or so the labels suggested. "Executive Orders" were being sold alongside what appeared to be a broken fax machine that once belonged to a disgraced former press secretary. Beneath an old banner proclaiming "Yes We Can!" lay a collection of rusty coffee mugs, each sporting a different inspirational slogan from the Obama administration, none of which could withstand the scrutiny of modern-day caffeine enthusiasts. “The best part? It’s all original!” exclaimed one eager senator, proudly clutching a faded napkin that had supposedly been touched by the hand of a former president while he was contemplating his next big decision. “I call it ‘Historic ‘—with an asterisk, of course.” Meanwhile, back at the “Swap Meet,” interns were busy setting up a “Bargain Bin” section filled with forgotten campaign swag from the last three elections—buttons that no one could decipher, rain ponchos still stacked from a particularly soggy inauguration, and enough yard signs to signal a political party of their own. “I got a Bernie Sanders ‘Feel the Bern’ keychain! Just 50 cents!” shouted one hopeful intern, clearly enthused about defying the odds of finding any resemblance of actual utility. As negotiations turned competitive, White House staff were seen engaging in fierce bartering, with one aide even attempting to trade a houseplant named "Billie" for a single rare Tic Tac from past vice presidential debates. “You can’t put a price on nostalgia—especially the sour kind,” quipped the aide while clutching her precious green bean. The grand finale came when the press secretary unexpectedly canceled a previously scheduled briefing to introduce a game-show style auction, complete with flashing lights and wild sound effects. “Maybe the speakers are broken,” whispered an intern, to which another replied, “Or maybe they’re just a tactical choice to drown out the sound of accountability!” As the day drew to a close, the administration was left with a trove of charmingly outdated contraptions, from the “Smartphone Briefing” that became a paperweight to the "Presidential Bidet"—a gadget that was never fully explained. Attendees staggered home, weighed down by the burdens they had found and given new life to. In a surreal twist of fate, the event successfully bridged the gap between bipartisan negotiations, offering participants what some might call “valuable life lessons”—that the best deals are often hidden in thrift-store wisdom. “Who would’ve thought,” sighed one jaded staff member, clutching an awkward ceramic bust of historic proportions, “that politics could be repurposed into art?” As the sun set on the nation's capital, whispers spread about hosting the “Lost and Found: Great Administration Swap Meet 2.0” next year, but this time, aiming for a “Who’s Who” of presidential memorabilia. Plans remain tentative, however, as officials attempt to stifle the budding rumor of a “Regrettable Decisions” exhibit featuring past White House pet shenanigans and questionable fashion choices.