In a shocking turn of events at the 45th Razzie Awards, Marvel's "Madame Web" spun a web of mediocrity that left audiences and critics alike scratching their heads—though perhaps not in bewildered wonder, but more in sheer disbelief. The film, which follows the enigmatic character of Madame Web on a quest for relevance in the sprawling Marvel Cinematic Universe, left the Razzie voters tangled in their seats, awarding it the title of Worst Picture, Worst Actress, and Worst Screenplay. The film’s star, who had previously garnered critical acclaim, took home the award for Worst Actress in a role that many are now dubbing “the greatest injustice since the invention of the salad.” As reporters tried to understand how someone could fall from grace so swiftly, sources revealed that her performance was not so much an acting choice but rather an act of self-preservation—by adopting a seemingly trance-like state, she managed to create a force field of confusion that shielded her from any critical reviews. Meanwhile, Jerry Seinfeld’s latest vain attempt at comedy, "Unfrosted," received two Razzie nods, proving that even the most seasoned comedians can stumble into the abyss of cinematic despair. Seinfeld took home the Worst Actor award, with his portrayal of a cereal mogul that left viewers wondering if the actor was quite possibly typecast in the role of “the cereal guy who has no business being in a movie.” As if adding insult to injury, Amy from "Seinfeld"—not to be confused with the sitcom’s iconic characters—also snagged the Worst Supporting Actress award for her performance that critics described as “if cardboard were a persona.” As the night progressed, acceptance speeches from the winners became increasingly bewildering, with Madame Web's star insisting she was merely "reciting lines from the latest IKEA assembly manual"—to which the audience erupted in laughter, a perplexing mix of horror and delight. The evening culminated in the unveiling of the Golden Raspberries, which are awarded for exceptionally poor performances, with "Madame Web" clearly taking the spotlight—much like the spider it embodies, ensnaring a whole bunch of talent into a sticky situation. When asked about the next installment, Marvel executives simply smiled and reiterated their commitment to “go in a different direction” while still scratching the surface of Hollywood's veins for the next best—and worst—thing. In these times of cinematic upheaval, it seems the Razzies will continue to serve as a beacon of hope for all who dare to venture forth into the realm of bad film-making. Here’s to you, "Madame Web"—for proving that sometimes a tangled web is better left unspun.