In a stunning revelation that has left Congress and the American public scratching their heads, the U.S. Treasury Department openly admitted that it thought its sensitive information was merely being shared among "friends" after a major cyber breach attributed to a Chinese state-sponsored actor. The letter, which was leaked to The Washington Post, conveyed a tone of bewilderment rather than urgency as officials expressed their shock at the blatant misuse of what they believed to be a casual friendship among nations. "We just assumed that, you know, what happens in government office lounges stays in the government office lounges. Turns out, that is not the case," one high-ranking official was quoted as saying. "We thought we were reaching a new level of transparency—sharing is caring!" The breach, which began with a seemingly innocuous software update from BeyondTrust, apparently led the hackers to access crucial government workstations and a treasure trove of unclassified documents. “Who knew a simple security key could end up on the black market like a secret family recipe?” the official mused, just before accidentally sending invites to next week’s ‘Cybersecurity 101’ workshop. While lawmakers were understandably outraged, Treasury officials remained upbeat, considering it a “learning opportunity.” “We just assumed that our ‘friends’ would keep our secrets safe, since we share the same group chat,” they countered, baffled that their trust had been misplaced. "Next time we’ll make sure to have an NDA signed—better yet, maybe we’ll introduce a no-sharing policy, like those ‘no phones at the dinner table’ rules.” Critics have suggested that the U.S. Treasury should invest in basic cybersecurity training, but officials assure them that “we're taking steps.” Plans are reportedly in motion to host a celebratory barbecue for all departments involved, during which they'll unveil a new motto: "If you can't trust your friends, who can you trust?" Meanwhile, as laughter mixed with disbelief washed over Washington, one Congressperson was overheard asking if the friends they'd made on Facebook were still safe to share vacation photos with, leaving many to wonder just how deep the digital rabbit hole of naivety really goes. As the Treasury Department basks in its newfound enlightenment, analysts warn that sitting next to your cyber adversaries in the digital space might just turn out to be less like a friendly chat and more like leaving your diary out in the open during a sleepover. The moral of the story? In the age of cybersecurity, if it feels like sharing, ask yourself: is it friendship—or just a backdoor to your most classified secrets?