In an unexpected turn of political events, former President Donald Trump has decided to crash President Biden's international party, set to take place in Paris at the historic Notre-Dame Cathedral. While Biden enjoys the waning days of his presidency, Trump is preparing what critics are dubbing a "political cookout" that aims to overshadow the ceremonial reopening of the iconic structure following its devastating fire. The event, scheduled for 7 p.m. local time (1 p.m. Eastern), promises to be a spectacle, as Trump plans to take the stage alongside French President Emmanuel Macron. White House sources claim Biden is choosing to abstain from the event, which some interpret as a strategic retreat in the face of a looming Trump news cycle. Instead, First Lady Jill Biden will be there, presumably armed with an appropriately tasteful selection of French pastries and a gracious smile, ready to mingle while her husband works on his awaited history book—tentatively titled "What I Did During My Presidency: A Visual Guide." While the world's leaders clink glasses and take in the charming Parisian atmosphere, many are left to wonder: what exactly is Trump planning to "unveil" at the ceremony? Rumors suggest a lavish buffet featuring his favorite fast food items, perhaps artfully arranged to resemble the cathedral's famous stained glass windows. “I just think a Big Mac looks a lot better than any of that fancy French cuisine,” Trump reportedly mused to aides. A new poll by the impeccably unbiased "We Like Trump" organization reveals that a majority of Americans believe Trump’s attendance is not just a power move but a tactical play to reclaim his spot as the de facto face of American policy abroad. “Biden might as well just hand over his foreign relations card to Trump at this point,” said one enthusiastic supporter. “What’s he gonna do? Attend boring meetings with world leaders? No thanks!” Meanwhile, the Biden administration insists that they are perfectly fine with Trump's antics. "He can have his moment in Paris," said an unnamed White House aide. “Jill and I will be enjoying some well-deserved downtime. Besides, Notre-Dame will always keep its architectural integrity—unlike the integrity of Trump’s last term in office.” In what promises to be the most politically charged reopening of a cathedral in modern history, the event will also feature a live-streamed performance of "Hallelujah," sung by a celestial choir. Observers are curious whether Trump will make his way to the microphone during the performance, unveiling a new rendition penned by himself—tentatively titled "Hallelujah to Me." With Trump set to bask in the candles and chandeliers of the famed structure, Biden’s team can only hope that the former president doesn’t commandeer the evening by announcing a run for the presidency 2028—marking a now bizarrely cyclical moment of political drama in the most romantic city in the world. As the world watches, one undeniable truth looms larger than the cathedral itself: when it comes to politics, never underestimate Trump’s ability to rain on anyone’s parade—even one taking place in the shadow of one of Europe's most beloved landmarks.