In a bold move to redefine space entertainment, SpaceX is gearing up for its seventh Starship test flight, dubbed the "Satellite Toss Olympics." This groundbreaking event will feature a spectacular competition where 10 high-tech "Starlink simulators" will take their first flight, only to be hurled out into space like overzealous Olympic athletes chasing a gold medal—except in this case, the gold medal is just an untraceable piece of debris. The much-anticipated launch window opens Thursday from 5 p.m. ET to 6 p.m. ET. While officials insist this will be a serious test of their satellite deployment capabilities, insiders reveal that the real goal is to see just how far they can throw their future internet providers into the cosmos before they orbit the Earth and begin a raucous game of celestial dodgeball. “We're really excited about the concept,” said a SpaceX engineer while adjusting a pair of novelty oversized sunglasses. “Think of it as the best way to test satellite deployment while keeping things fresh and fun. We’re basically putting the ‘fun’ back in functional space technology!” Critics have questioned the wisdom of launching simulators that won’t actually provide internet access, leading to some impassioned debates over whether this qualifies as space research or just a glorified carnival game. “If they want to toss things into space, they should at least make it competitive,” grumbled one astrophysicist, scratching their head in disbelief. “Why not feature a live audience and a prize for whoever can retrieve one of these ‘simulators’ without a spaceship?” The company’s CEO, Elon Musk, chimed in with characteristic bravado. “Why have boring old rocket missions when you can have stealthy satellite slam dunks? We’ll even throw in a Tesla as a lucky winner for whoever catches a simulator, but you’ll need to already be in orbit to claim it!” As the countdown to launch continues, fans are already suggesting potential commentary teams and contestants for the 'Satellite Toss'. Suggestions range from celebrity astrophysicists to animated space mascots, because what could be more entertaining than a faux competition with high-stakes debris? As the world prepares for Thursday’s launch, the question on everyone’s mind is whether SpaceX will finally succeed in turning satellite deployment into an actual sport. Because let’s face it, if a rocket can hurl a satellite into space, it might as well have a cheering crowd and a halftime show, right? Tune in as we witness the future of space exploration: one simulator at a time.