Las Cruces, NM – In a shocking turn of events that can only be described as bureaucratic gymnastics meets tragic comedy, residents of Las Cruces have discovered that their dreams of community involvement are thwarted by a newly unveiled ‘Board of Obscure Purpose’ (B.O.O.P.)—a body so complicated and irrelevant that it could only spring from the minds of city planners suffering from a severe case of existential ennui. Upon hearing the news that their dreams of participating in local governance would require them to now apply for a seat on B.O.O.P., residents flocked to City Hall, clutching hopes of civic engagement and ideally a chance to “make a difference.” Little did they know that someone had decided that the best way to improve community involvement was to create a committee that mediates committees, which mediates other committees, and so forth, ad infinitum. The primary agenda? To discuss how to discuss meetings. Because why settle for straightforward reform when you can wrap it in a bureaucratic burrito? “I thought this was a chance for the people to be heard,” lamented local artist and part-time pastel vendor, Maria, as she desperately tried to decipher B.O.O.P.’s charter, an 84-page document fully comprised of legal jargon and whimsical doodles. “Instead, I’m just filling out forms in triplicate to be allowed to fill out another form just to attend a meeting about a meeting about… whatever this is.” One intrepid local, Steve “The Activist” Rodriguez, attempted to bring hope to the disenfranchised when he declared his candidacy for a seat at the table. Following a rigorous three-hour training session on the “Five Steps to Effective Mediating of Mediators,” he emerged emboldened. Unfortunately, upon submitting his application, he received the following message: “Your dreams have been filed successfully in a special queue for review, which will take approximately 10 weeks. Please check back whenever.” Local residents were left wondering how discussing dreams could become synonymous with an endless loop of paperwork. “I thought democracy meant having a voice,” said one resident, as she stared blankly at her ‘B.O.O.P. Waiting Room’ wristband. “Turns out it’s just a seating chart for a really long play where no one knows the lines.” In a desperate attempt to combat the convoluted bureaucracy, a grassroots initiative emerged. Dubbed “Operation Do-It-Yourselves,” citizens are encouraged to simply ignore B.O.O.P. and take matters into their own hands. Early meetings held behind the local taco truck saw gatherings of former committee members now robustly discussing how to convert spare used office chairs into seats at gathering spaces dubbed “S.I.T. (Squad Initiating Togetherness).” City council member and self-proclaimed “Bureaucratic Facilitator,” Jim Halperin, responded to the outcry with trademark optimism. “It’s all part of a larger plan to engage citizens in the democratic process,” he said, eyes twinkling like someone who has just binge-watched too many motivational videos. “Once people understand the necessary steps to participate in B.O.O.P., they’ll realize that the true reward is the journey itself… and probably a vague tweet from us about their concerns.” This encouragement has yet to bear fruit, however, as B.O.O.P. continues to meet every Tuesday with only a handful of members—most of whom are unsure what they’re meeting about. Consequently, an undeniable spirit of hope lingers among the community, though many residents wonder if they might accidentally stumble into an alternate dimension first. Believe it or not, there is, however, a silver lining: taxes have been raised for the inquisitive ‘community involvement’ line item, which, quite ironically, will fund the next year’s seminars on “Effective Dream Management.” Till then, Las Cruces continues to grapple with a bureaucracy that seems determined to keep dreams ever so tantalizingly out of reach—unless, of course, you’re familiar with the latest B.O.O.P. paperwork, which is currently suffering a backup due to clerical oversight.