In a move that has left citizens of the Great White North both bewildered and bemused, city officials in Toronto have announced the highly anticipated signing of the Great Toronto Agreement, a pact designed to address everything from traffic congestion to the best places to get a good bagel. The event, dubbed “Sealing the Deal,” is set for next Tuesday, with one peculiar stipulation: every attendee must bring their own pen. Mayor Lighthearted, known for his quirky sense of humor, stated at a recent press conference, “We want this signing to be both formal and fun! After all, nothing says ‘I take this agreement seriously’ like a glittery gel pen or, let’s say, a neon green highlighter!” The Mayor then pointed to his bedazzled pen, which has been a hot topic on social media, and declared, “This baby is my secret weapon—let's get this paper signed with style!” As the day approaches, local pen enthusiasts have gone into a tizzy. Local pen shops are reporting a surge in sales, with “Sealing the Deal” packages flying off the shelves. “You can get anything from classic ballpoints to fancy fountain pens,” one enthusiastic shop owner exclaimed. “Don't forget the refill cartridges! You don’t want to run out of ink mid-signature—talk about a plot twist!” But it's not just about writing utensils. In true Canadian fashion, the signing ceremony will feature an array of activities designed to amuse and entertain. The city has promised free poutine for the first 100 attendees, a ‘pun-off’ competition, and a raffle where the winner will receive the “Golden Pen Award” for the wittiest penmanship displayed during the signing. Contestants are already sharpening their pencils (and pun skills) in preparation. “I’ve been practicing for weeks,” said local comedian and pen aficionado Tim “The Tip” McCarthy. “I plan to strike a pose while signing and deliver a pun that will make history. How about, ‘I’m ink-tensively excited for this agreement!’” In a last-minute twist, the Planning Committee has confirmed that all signatories will be seated in oversized chairs shaped like pens. Each chair comes equipped with a vibrating feature to keep participants energized, because what is a signing ceremony without a bit of shock value and a twinge of discomfort? However, not everyone is on board with the shenanigans. Protestors took to social media branding the event as “Proof of Pen-der Stress.” Critics argue that the event trivializes serious issues like housing and public transport. “Who cares about a glitter pen? I just want to get home without ending up in a gridlock of epic proportions!” said one concerned citizen. Despite the controversy, anticipation is reaching a crescendo as the day draws near. City officials have promised a "magical" atmosphere with festive decorations featuring giant pens and paperclips hanging from every streetlamp. Local families are gearing up to turn this often-dry event into an all-day affair, packing picnic baskets filled with Tim Bits and mysteriously-shaped sandwiches. In the end, Torontonians may well leave the ceremony with more than just a signature; they'll leave with memories—and possibly some puns—that will last a lifetime. As Mayor Lighthearted stated in concluding the press conference, “Remember, folks: It’s not just about bringing your own pen; it's about sealing the deal with a smile—and maybe a dab of ink on your cheek!” So grab your favorite writing instrument, practice your best puns, and prepare for a signing event that promises to be both a historic and hilariously ink-splattered affair!