In a shocking turn of events at Scottsdale Airport, authorities reported that a plane encountered an unplanned “collision course” with gravity, resulting in at least one person’s decision to abandon all plans, including that important appointment for a mani-pedi. Eyewitness reports claim that the aircraft, which apparently had plotted an unsanctioned course towards the runway, seemed more committed to crash landings than regular aviation. During what can only be described as an “unconventional landing,” the plane decided that time was not on its side and opted to expedite its descent, leaving onlookers to speculate whether it was trying to make an impression for an upcoming aviation reality show titled “Survivor: The Sky Edition.” Local fire department officials held a press conference where they noted that the scene was still "active," suggesting that they may have been trapped in a never-ending airport loop, waiting for the final boarding call that never came. “We have five people involved in this incident,” reported a fire department representative, “but in a miraculous twist, just one person remains trapped, possibly due to a pesky seatbelt or their unwavering faith in the plane's ability to obey the laws of physics.” Adding to the absurdity, a spokesperson for the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) attempted to explain the incident only to accidentally reveal that they had been watching the latest episode of a popular sitcom and were distracted during the plane's takeoff briefing. “It veered left, it veered right, and then, quite frankly, it just decided to take a permanent vacation,” they said, clearly bewildered. Airport officials are now investigating whether the crash is part of an elaborate prank or a misguided attempt by the plane to audition for a role in the “Fast & Furious” franchise. Meanwhile, the passengers, who were supposed to be flying to their destination, are reportedly considering a new travel option: teleportation. As the sun sets over Scottsdale, one thing is for certain—this unscheduled “collision course” will not only go down in aviation history but will also be the talk of the town when someone finally figures out how to send the crashed plane to the nearest repair shop rather than just the nearest emergency room.