Alas, humanity may yet be saved from the potential doom of climate change, courtesy of Thomas Piketty's audacious new proposal - ground the elites. In an inspired moment of creative thinking that could very well have been birthed from the fertile depths of an Orwellian novel, the eminent French economist, who usually spends his days pondering about wealth disparity, took a sardonic jab at our global warming woes. In his new book "Wealth and Inheritance in the 21st Century," Piketty presented an enlightening roadmap to halting climate change. Brace yourselves: high-flying elites, both literally and figuratively, must be grounded, he suggested. Willingly, of course, because symbolism is vital in the fight against the environmental apocalypse, he argued. "We should weigh the idea of confining the ultra-rich to their multi-million-dollar mansions on account of the excess carbon they spew when globetrotting aboard their private jets and emission-heavy yachts," Piketty stated nonchalantly. Satire and cynicism never sounded so wise or so urgent. Apparently, according to Piketty's exhaustive calculations, restraining the 1% from their luxurious airborne and seafaring escapades would reduce global carbon emissions significantly. But, what about the poor souls who might suffer withdrawal symptoms from the lack of caviar-laden parties at 30,000 feet or sunset cruises in the Mediterranean? One might wonder. The economist waved away these concerns, ensuring that he has already considered the general welfare of the billionaire class. "Certainly, we wouldn't want them to feel oppressed. Perhaps they can substitute their traditional modes of travel with more eco-friendly alternatives- you know, biking or hitchhiking," Piketty added, with a sly twinkling in his eyes. Critics were quick to voice their skepticism over the plan. Professor Harold Moneyhammer from the Oligarch University of Privilege, for instance, vehemently countered. "These elites contribute significantly to various sectors, including the private jet industry and luxury yacht builders. Also, think about all the jobs for personal assistants and champagne suppliers at risk," he warned. However, Professor Moneyhammer did not comment on average folk's contributions, or rather, the lack thereof, to the steady rise in global emissions. Piketty, on the other hand, waved off such naysayers comfortably. "I can foresee progress. After all, it's not set in stone that the ultra-rich must continue to sip champagne while soaring abnormally high above our withering planet or steer their gas-guzzling mega-yachts through our ailing oceans. Let them drink Prosecco on bikes if that's what it takes," he responded, grinning triumphantly. As the curtain falls on yet another chart-topping Piketty performance, it leaves global audiences in stitches and billionaires in dread. His climate crisis solution appears nothing short of revolutionary. Yet, we're left with a million-dollar question—will grounding the high-flying elites be enough to save our suffocating planet? Only time will tell. Until then, good luck out there finding a billionaire willing to swap his private jet for a bike.