In a bold move that has left many scratching their heads, Rwandan President Paul Kagame has announced plans to host Formula 1 races in a country that has historically struggled to keep its roads intact, let alone accommodate speed machines that can race at over 200 miles per hour. You know, just a casual transition from national recovery to hyper-speed racing, because why not? "Forget about the track record—literally. It’s time for Rwanda to draft a new one!" Kagame declared at a press conference, surrounded by a fleet of luxury cars that will probably never see the other side of a pothole. "If we can recover from genocide, surely we can innovate our way to becoming one of the key players in the auto racing world. We have the heart; all we need now is a straight line and a lot of safety gear." Critics have questioned whether this initiative might be a bit too ambitious for a country where the primary traffic concerns include goats, bicycles, and the occasional manhole cover that might as well be a portal to another dimension. Nevertheless, Kagame believes that Rwandans will adapt to their new role as motorsport enthusiasts—after all, he envisions a place where the cries of “gentlemen, start your engines!” might drown out the sound of struggling public transport. The Formula 1 Grand Prix in Rwanda is expected to draw a global audience, inspiring future generations to consider careers in racing, even if they’ve never seen a racetrack. “Rwanda is all about taking things to the next level,” said an unapologetically enthusiastic Kagame. “And if that means converting the picturesque Lake Kivu into a water-slick circuit, so be it.” Mocking the historical backdrop, a government official quipped, “We’re just fast-tracking our redemption story!” Meanwhile, experts have begun to suggest that the nation's longstanding issue with potholes could be creatively embraced into the competition: “Think of it as extreme racing. Forget the racing line—survive it!” In a whimsical twist, local citizens have already started painting road signs with encouraging phrases like, “Race to Excellence,” “Fasten Your Seatbelt for Progress,” and “No Potholes, No Problem.” It’s a reminder that even in the heart of Africa, ambition—and perhaps absurdity—know no limits. To fund the initiative, the government has already considered a series of creative income strategies ranging from ticket sales for an unnamed “mystery ride experience” to potentially charging spectators per earnest prayer for the safety of participants. And for those old-fashioned folks who wonder about the future, local authorities have promised enriched Wi-Fi zones along the entire racing route, just so fans can livestream their hopes for a flawless racetrack on social media. So, the next time you hear roaring engines and see a puff of tire smoke rising around Kigali, remember, it’s just Rwanda racing toward a dream—who needs a track record, anyway?