In a bold and unexpected move, the leaders of the world’s most influential countries have convened to discuss a radical new initiative dubbed “Return Africa: Because Why Not Recolonize with a Twist?” Forget the colonial era of the past; this new plan involves a delightful cocktail of old-world charm and modern “interactive experiences” designed to bring a fresh flavor to the age-old practice of colonization. “Why should we reminisce about the good old days of colonization when we can spice things up?” remarked one world leader, who was last seen sporting socks with sandals during a high-profile dinner. “Our new initiative is all about celebrating diversity while imposing our will – it’s practically cultural exchange, right?” The flagship component of this initiative involves rebranding Africa as an expansive amusement park. “We’re talking about rides like ‘Exploit the Resources’ and ‘Cultural Appropriation Coaster’,” explained a spokesperson from the Ministry of Economic Disruption. “Each ride will offer tourists an authentic taste of colonialism, complete with reenactments and souvenir tents selling 'colonial chic' merchandise.” In an unprecedented twist, an interactive game called “Presidential Monopoly” will invite lucky players to compete for territories using monopoly money, all while trying to avoid the various “dictator cards” that can send them to the back of the line. “It’s capitalism at its finest!” a game developer who specializes in distasteful and historically inaccurate board games enthused. With great fanfare, the initiative also promises to 'free' Africa from its current leadership—by embracing a select few leaders who will be granted VIP status in the newly formed Commonwealth of Tourist Attractions. Local populations, handpicked for their diverse range of indigenous cultures, will become the park's primary entertainers, performing traditional dances to the soundtrack of the latest pop hits. After all, who wouldn’t want to experience a cultural performance while queueing for the “Bureaucracy Bungee Jump”? “This isn’t just about recolonizing,” another leader chimed in, casually polishing a monocle. “It’s about capitalist synergy! We’re investing in Africa’s potential to become the new hotspot for ecotourism, complete with all the commodification you would expect from a Wal-Mart opening. Plus, the perks include both Instagrammable locations and plenty of hashtags to keep things trendy.” Despite some initial pushback from the local populations who prefer not to be part of a giant theme park experiment, organizers remain optimistic. “Once they see the value of the ‘Return Africa’ experience, they’ll embrace it,” boasted a marketing executive with a questionable grasp of historical contexts. “Besides, who can resist a good funnel cake?” On the horizon, numerous world leaders are planning a promotional tour, complete with a press conference, a parade of parade floats themed after various resource-rich countries, and a fashion show featuring the latest in colonial-inspired style: khakis with a hint of exploitation. As the world awaits the launch of “Return Africa: Because Why Not Recolonize with a Twist?”, one thing is clear: history may not repeat itself, but it sure knows how to remix.