In an unexpected twist of fate, Real Madrid has officially rebranded itself as a "Ten-Man Army" following an intense 1-0 showdown against Deportivo Alaves, thanks largely to none other than Kylian Mbappe, who apparently is now focusing on his side hobby: collecting red cards. The match took place in the picturesque town of Vitoria-Gasteiz, where hopes of a high-octane attacking display were dashed when the French superstar decided to demonstrate what happens when ‘overzealous tackling’ goes wrong. With the finesse of a circus elephant on roller skates, Mbappe clattered into Alaves’ Antonio Blanco, earning himself a straight red card and casting his teammates into a state of bewildered confusion. One might say he truly “took one for the team” – or perhaps “took one for his card collection!” Before the mayhem, Eduardo Camavinga had given Los Blancos the lead with a stunning curled shot from outside the box, a feat that, for a brief moment, allowed fans to forget the impending doom of playing without their star player. However, the sheer absurdity of having a squad of just ten players soon became the main attraction of the evening. The crowd even began chanting, "Ten is the new eleven!" raising eyebrows and confusion in equal measure. As the match wore on, the remaining ten warriors of Madrid showed resilience, pulling off a defensive display that some are already dubbing as “The Alaves Fortress.” For spectators and pundits alike, watching Real Madrid stand strong with one less man was like witnessing an extravagant magic trick — the kind where the magician makes half his assistants disappear, but the show must go on. Meanwhile, post-match, a bemused Mbappe stood outside the locker room showing off his latest acquisition, an almost gleeful collection of red cards. “I’ll display them right next to my trophies,” he announced, perhaps hinting at a lucrative alternative career in art curation. “Some say I play with fire, but I just prefer to keep it red-hot!” In one of the more dramatic twists of the evening, Alaves fans left the stadium ecstatic despite the loss, claiming they had just witnessed the tactical genius of coach Javier Calleja combine with Real Madrid’s newfound tenacity. “If they keep getting sent off, we might just be able to beat them every time!” one supporter shouted in pure optimism. As for Real Madrid, the win against relegation-threatened Alaves came as a relief, though they may want to have a serious talk with Mbappe about his tackling techniques. Should they not do so, fans may soon find themselves petitioning for a new channel: “Kylian’s Wild World of Red Cards,” a weekly show showcasing his best moments. In light of this, Real Madrid can proudly claim to lead the league in both wins and controversial red cards; a testament to the idea that rule-bending is an art form in its own right, especially if one of the pieces is currently on display in a collection!