In a stunning twist of royal tradition, Queen Camilla has boldly chosen comfort over crown, announcing her decision to skip the Royal Variety Performance in favor of binge-watching her favorite soap operas from the comfort of her sofa. The 77-year-old monarch, who has been grappling with a chest infection, has taken her doctors' advice quite literally, declaring, “Couch time is the new royal duty!” In an official statement that has sent shockwaves through Buckingham Palace, a spokesperson revealed that the Queen is not just recovering from illness but is also embracing her newfound independence. “After lengthy consultations with her medical team, Her Majesty has concluded that deep breathing and endless episodes of ‘Coronation Street’ are essential for her recovery,” the spokesperson added. Sources close to the royal family revealed that the Queen has ordered an extra-large assortment of snacks and a plush throw blanket, insisting that no royal person should engage in duty while under the cloud of post-viral malaise. “She informed the palace staff to avoid any interruptions during her ‘recovery period,’” said one insider. “Not even a parade of corgis could lure her back to royal life right now.” Buckingham Palace has announced that the Queen will instead be “streaming in spirit” from her living room with the aid of a custom-made royal popcorn bowl. Friends speculate that this might just be a trial run for a new trend in monarchy: ‘Regal Resting.’ “Why traverse the globe and attend endless events when you can achieve imperial relaxation in your pajamas?” asked a royal expert. Critics, however, are divided. Some are touting her decision as a step towards modernizing the monarchy, while others lament the loss of royal flair. “What’s next?” one critic wondered aloud. “Queen Camilla taking a sabbatical to film TikToks? What a slippery slope!” Royal watchers are eagerly anticipating how this unprecedented choice will shape future engagements—will King Charles follow suit and declare a “rest weekend”? Only time will tell. Meanwhile, Camilla plans to cultivate her “sofa sovereignty” into a full-fledged campaign for cozy living, potentially heralding a new era where crown jewels and cozy blankets reign side by side. As the palace prepares for the performance without its queen, staff members have already started brainstorming ways to incorporate snacks into the evening’s events. After all, if Camilla can’t be there in body, she’ll surely be represented by a tidal wave of junk food and a spirited cheer—or perhaps a thoughtful critique—on the latest plot twists in daytime drama.