Producer's Plea to Chief Minister: Lights, Camera, Action...Help! In an unprecedented move that has left everybody dumbstruck, a local film producer, Mr. Desperate N. Hopeless, recently wrote a heartfelt letter to the Chief Minister, Be U. Sleepal, requesting help to fix the collection of disasters that is his latest film venture, "Oh No, Not Again!". "Help, Chief Minister!" was how the letter began in a bold Comic Sans font, which we all know is reserved for serious business only. "This film means everything to me and for the life of me, I can't figure out what's wrong with it. I hoped we could come up with a government-subsidized plan to rescue my movie from the depths of despair," Mr. Hopeless plea read. It seems that the producer has exhausted all other avenues, including soliciting advice from his local fortune teller, flagging down Paul Rudd in an alley for some tips, and even desperately calling for assistance from the aliens in Area 51. "I mean, if they can fly across galaxies, the least they can do is tell me how to end my movie," he stated disappointingly. Our sources confirm that the script for "Oh No, Not Again!" has been undergoing constant rewrites since its conception in 1992, supposedly inspired by the hopes and dreams of future film producers the world over. However, the ill-advised decision to cast his accountant and hairdresser in the lead roles, combined with his increasingly nonsensical edits, have led to what critics are calling a "mega disaster of cataclysmic proportions." The Chief Minister's office, gearing up for his upcoming third consecutive term in office, found time in his busy schedule to respond to Mr. Hopeless' plea, stating, "I have decided to form a special committee, consisting of my cook, stylist, and gardener, to look into the grievous matter of fixing your film. I appreciate your faith in the government's ability to rectify all things broken, including ridiculous movie plots." The response sent Mr. Hopeless into a state of euphoria that caught the attention of his neighbors, and he promptly sent a thank you in the form of a large fruit basket, featuring fruits that aren't locally available, thus proving his faith in the Chief Minister's divine influence. As the entire nation takes a collective sigh of relief knowing that this "mega disaster" will be fixed exclusively by government forces, one brave critic with too much time on his hands suggested a simpler solution, "Why not just scrap the entire movie? Start fresh with a new plot and better casting!" But, alas, that opinion was drowned out among the chants of "Long live the Chief Minister!"