In a stunning move that has left historians reeling and sports fans scratching their heads, the Department of Defense (DoD) has removed a webpage celebrating baseball legend Jackie Robinson's military service, only to replace it with a sleek, modern entry entitled "DEI Sports Heroes: A New Era of Athletic Inspiration." The original page, which showcased Robinson’s valor and contributions during World War II, now redirects eager viewers to a page drenched in the latest DEI jargon, complete with obligatory buzzwords and promptly sourced graphic design elements. This unexpected pivot comes on the heels of a February 27 memo from the Pentagon announcing a sweeping “digital content refresh,” primarily targeting any articles and narratives that might not embrace the committee-approved diversity framework. Analysts speculate this might be an attempt to realign national security with cultural competency, a bold strategy on the part of the Department. “Why celebrate a singular hero when we can have a whole basket of heroes validated through the magical lens of diversity?” said a Pentagon spokesperson, who, in an ironic twist, chose to remain anonymous. Critics of the initiative have pointed out that the decision to erase Robinson’s legacy is less about freshening up the digital landscape and more reminiscent of a bizarre form of historical rewrite. “What’s next? Rebranding the founding fathers as ‘Inclusive Architects of Democracy’?” mused a bemused historian while shaking their head in disbelief. Meanwhile, social media has exploded with both outrage and bewilderment, as fans of Robinson and sports historians alike express their disbelief and disapproval over the elimination of a historical figure whose impact transcended sports and commanded respect in a time of racial segregation. “It’s as if they think Jackie was just a player, not a pioneer,” tweeted one incredulous user. “Sure, let’s just vilify history in the name of ‘refreshing’ it!” In response to the backlash, the Pentagon has announced a series of virtual town halls entitled “Not Erasing History: Just Realigning It,” where they promise to explain how the updates will enrich our understanding of past heroes. “After all, Jackie Robinson never wore his military uniform while hitting home runs,” quipped the spokesperson, suggesting that understanding his military service is secondary to viewing his contributions through a contemporary lens of diversity and equity. “Let’s take the focus back to the collective group of underrepresented athletes whose stories can now thrive under this shiny DEI umbrella!” As of now, the page celebrating Robinson has officially been archived, leaving an eerie void where his honor once reigned. Discussions are ongoing about future deletions, with names like “George Washington: Father of DEI” rumored to be next on the chopping block. Only time will tell how deep this digital delete-a-thon will go, and whether fans of history—and sports—will continue to tolerate this curious new direction.