In a shocking twist of fate that has left the world of sports gasping for air (somewhat ironically, given Coventry's background), Zimbabwe's Kirsty Coventry has been elected as the new president of the International Olympic Committee. With a mere two Olympic gold medals under her cap—and perhaps a few questionable political connections—Coventry has shown the world that you really don’t need decades of experience to take the reins of one of the most powerful institutions in sports. At just 41, she is celebrated as the youngest president in Olympic history—proving that age is just a number, especially when you can swim faster than the competition. In a move that has upended tradition and sent waves through the sporting community, she replaces Germany's Thomas Bach, who had been holding onto the presidency like a last-place swimmer clinging to a buoy for dear life since 2013. Interestingly enough, Coventry's election came as a surprise to many experts, particularly those who had placed bets on Lord Coe, the head honcho of World Athletics, who was rumored to have a solid chance. “I was told elections were about charisma and experience,” Coe lamented while sipping a gold-infused protein shake post-election, “but I guess all you need is a winning smile and a swim cap.” Coventry’s ascension also marks a landmark moment for representation, achieving the trifecta of "firsts": the first woman, the first African, and the youngest person to hold the position. As she was sworn in, Coventry reportedly vowed to bring “a fresh splash” to an otherwise stagnant Olympic committee. Critics have since pointed out that "fresh splash" could mean anything from implementing new swimming regulations to catapulting ‘pool selfies’ into the Olympic sports catalog. Now, what lies ahead under Coventry’s leadership? Rumors suggest ambitious plans to introduce a new medal event for synchronized smartphone swimming, where athletes post their best underwater selfies and judge each other based on likes received. After all, who really needs to stick to tradition when you can have a medal for looking fabulous while thrashing about in a pool? Facing her new role, Coventry has promised to prioritize “inclusivity” and “innovation.” Insiders suggest that athletes might soon be competing under a new guiding principle: “If it’s not on Instagram, did it even happen?” This new framework might very well redefine athleticism itself—because let’s face it, in today’s world, a good filter is as precious as any gold medal. As the delegations prepare to look up from their laptops and hold sports events in the real world again, Coventry’s presidency may just mark a bizarre yet thrilling chapter in Olympic history. Meanwhile, other Olympic committee members are reportedly scrambling for a swim coach to keep up with their new head honcho. After all, even the most seasoned bureaucrats may need to drown-proof themselves in the new tide of Coventry's leadership.