NASA's Astronauts Eager to Reboard Boeing’s Starliner: 'Next Time, We Hope It Just Lands on Earth!' In what can only be described as an out-of-this-world sitcom, NASA's astronauts have expressed their unyielding eagerness to reboard Boeing’s Starliner spacecraft, a vessel that recently showcased its unique talent for returning to Earth without, you know, actually bringing astronauts back. After SpaceX heroically swooped in like a celestial Uber, transporting the duo home after an extended hotel stay on the International Space Station, the astronauts confidently approached the press with the bold proclamation: “We just hope next time it lands on Earth!” During a perplexingly upbeat news conference, the astronauts, clearly high on microgravity and boundless optimism, acknowledged the overwhelming media interest in their 9-month home away from home. “Honestly, we thought we were the only ones who cared about all those breathtaking views of Earth,” they chuckled. “But apparently, being blasted into orbit in an aluminum can with a questionable safety record is a hot topic!” Veteran astronaut, Wilmore, ingeniously took full responsibility for Boeing's previous space misadventure, wherein the spacecraft decided that Earth wasn’t quite ready for its return. “I’ll start and point the finger at myself,” he quipped. “I mean, who knew the Starliner was more of a ‘space tourist’ than a ‘space transport?’ When it didn't land with us, I thought it was just trying to get a better view of the stars!” Meanwhile, Boeing representatives scrambled to regain credibility, likening the Starliner's snafus to “a temporary vacation.” “Every good vacation needs a few hiccups, right? Just think of it as an extended layover in orbit!” they exclaimed, as they clashed their hands together in corporate enthusiasm, leaving some to ponder why this “layover” involved astronauts floating in limbo for over nine months. As the laughter continued to echo through the press room, the astronauts accentuated their key message: “We're all in this for the mission! Never mind that our families were wondering if we’d ever come home. Those floating donuts in zero gravity had us completely distracted!” When asked about their hopes for the next Starliner attempt, they collectively sighed, “Yeah, we’re really rooting for a successful landing—preferably on solid ground this time, not the nearest Starbucks on Mars!” In a twist that left everyone both puzzled and amused, the astronauts suggested that any future test flights should include “mandatory popcorn and a reality TV theme,” promising that any future misadventures would at least be entertaining enough for Earth to tune in. So, here’s to the ambitious astronauts, the comedy of errors that is Boeing’s Starliner, and the impending episode where they all remember that the best journeys end with a solid landing—preferably without a detour through the cosmos.