In a shocking turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the culinary world, McDonald's has announced that the McRib will officially be taking the throne as the true centerpiece of holiday feasts, overshadowing traditional holiday staples like turkey and ham. Fast-food enthusiasts everywhere are reportedly gearing up to swap their Thanksgiving turkeys for the beloved, albeit notoriously elusive, McRib once it makes its grand return. "As families gather this holiday season, we can't ignore the undeniable pull of the McRib," said a McDonald's spokesperson. "Who needs a dry turkey when you can enjoy a succulent slab of pork, lovingly shaped into a rack of ribs? It's the crescendo of flavors – barbecue sauce, pickles, onions – all nestled in a bun that whispers of home." Critics, however, are taking issue with the sudden elevation of a fast-food sandwich above centuries-old holiday traditions. “What’s next? Pumpkin pie made with McFlurry?” questioned a local food historian, visibly shaken. “We might as well suggest that people replace their cranberry sauce with BBQ sauce while they’re at it!” In a related announcement, noted chefs and culinary schools are scrambling to rethink their holiday menus, with a growing movement advocating for "McRib-themed" Thanksgiving dinners. Instagram influencers are reportedly lining up to showcase their McRib turkeys, garnished with pickles and barbecue drizzle, as the must-have centerpiece for 2023. To further the excitement, fans of the McRib are gathering in tight-knit communities online, sharing recipes for "McRib stuffing" and "McRib casseroles." Whole foods are being boycotted as citizens applaud their decision to focus solely on the tender pork patty that’s been absent from their lives for nearly a decade. "Having turkey feels passé. My heart swells with joy knowing I'll be able to bite into that delightful sandwich again," said one ecstatic fan, already ordering a month’s supply of McRib for the family feast. And while local grocery stores may suffer reduced sales as families ditch traditional holiday turkeys for the fast-food icon, McDonald's has all but confirmed that the McRib’s return will not only boost their profits but also begin a new era of holiday celebrations. "We foresee families gathering to share sweet moments over a basket of McRibs instead of the usual fare," the spokesperson added cheerfully. "This is just the beginning. Who knows – we may even see an 'All McRib Holiday' soon!” As the countdown to the McRib's return begins, one thing is crystal clear: this holiday season, forget the pilgrims and their grateful feasts; it's the year of the rib.