In an extravagant gathering that could only be described as "Silicon Valley meets Bollywood," Prime Minister Narendra Modi hosted a soiree for tech titans at the swanky Lotte New York Palace Hotel. The event, aptly dubbed "Modi's Tech Soiree: Where CEOs Converge to Decipher If AI Can Fix India's Traffic," featured the biggest names in technology, all eager to solve a problem that has baffled humanity since the invention of the automobile: traffic jams. While attendees sipped on artisanal avocado toast and debated whether AI could make roads less congested or simply incite more road rage, Modi laid out a tantalizing vision of India's growth prospects. According to sources, he set the scene by dramatically pointing to a pie chart that illustrated the correlation between traffic jams and missed opportunities for local chai vendors. "Imagine a world where AI not only predicts traffic but also preemptively tells the chaiwalla to set up shop just ahead!" Modi proclaimed, as CEOs tried to hide their bemusement behind their kale smoothies. The CEOs, representing 15 US-based firms—many of whom couldn’t find India on a map if their annual bonuses depended on it—nodded vigorously, hoping their enthusiastic gestures would translate into lucrative contracts. When asked about their contributions, one CEO boldly suggested creating an app that would allow users to order chai from the comfort of their vehicles, turning the daily commute into a mobile café experience. "Think Uber, but with more spices!" he enthused, blissfully unaware that this might not actually reduce traffic. As the discussion shifted to quantum computing, one skeptical tech mogul wondered aloud if harnessing quantum mechanics could finally explain why every ride-sharing app seems to take users on a panoramic tour of the city instead of the fastest route. "If we could just manipulate spacetime a little," he muttered, looking around to gauge the seriousness of his idea. "Or maybe we just need better signposts." Meanwhile, Modi, keen on showcasing his prowess, proposed a bold plan to implement AI traffic signals that could predict human behavior. "Imagine signals that know when someone is just too impatient to wait!" he beamed. "They could turn green in sympathy, creating a whole new level of empathy on the roads!" Little did he know that the same technology could be applied to politicians on election day, turning their campaign promises into green lights (or perhaps red flags). As the evening wound down, attendees were treated to a presentation on a cutting-edge AI program that could analyze social media trends to predict the future of traffic. “It's like crystal ball gazing but with algorithms,” one techie quipped, prompting laughter as they all realized they were inadvertently working on the world’s most sophisticated traffic horoscope. In the end, the roundtable proved to be a resounding success, not because they found a solution to India's notorious traffic woes, but because they solidified their networks over delicious hors d'oeuvres, while earning a custom-made friendship wristband that read, "AI can optimistically jam the roads." As the attendees filed out amidst an excess of laughter and future collaboration ideas loosely tied to the concept of traffic management, one thing was abundantly clear: AI may one day rule the roads, but for now, it was the CEOs who seemingly ruled the world’s banquet tables.