Local authorities were left scratching their heads yesterday afternoon after a man was arrested in a West End neighborhood for attempting to rob a convenience store armed with nothing but a toy water gun and a heart full of misguided enthusiasm. Witnesses reported that 32-year-old Johnny “The Mischief Maker” Thompson burst into the store, shouting excitedly, “This is a stick-up! Give me all the candy and soda you have! I’m the ultimate game-changer!” Store clerk Martha Jenkins described the scene as “equal parts hilarious and terrifying.” “At first, I thought he was just a really enthusiastic kid who forgot his Halloween costume, but then… there was the water gun,” she said, shaking her head. “I didn’t want to burst his bubble, but it was clear this wasn’t your average robbery.” Thompson was reportedly surprised when police arrived on the scene a few minutes later. "I thought they were the cops! It's just a game, right? Like, a really intense version of 'Cops and Robbers'! I even had my best friend, Dale, holding my getaway scooter outside!” Thompson stated in bewilderment as officers handcuffed him. "In my mind, I was winning!" Local police chief, Ed McRoberts, appeared baffled by Thompson’s rationale during a press conference. "We understand that 'Cops and Robbers' is a childhood classic, but there seems to be a critical component missing here,” McRoberts quipped. “It usually doesn’t include actual theft, and the water gun is not an approved firearm for use in the line of duty.” In defense of his less-than-conventional strategy, Thompson explained to officers that his life had been “too boring” and that he was simply trying to bring the joy of childhood games into adulthood. “I thought I would become infamous, like one of those reality stars!” he exclaimed, looking wistful. “But now, all I’ll be known for is this!” Dale, Thompson's accomplice, who was waiting outside with the getaway scooter—which turned out to be his mom’s electric scooter for the elderly—could not be reached for comment as he was reportedly “recovering” from the embarrassment. However, sources suggest that he may have snuck back into the store to see if they were still offering the candy Thompson had requested. While awaiting his trial, Thompson remains optimistic. “Hey, at least I’m scoring some media coverage! Maybe I should get a sponsor, like those energy drinks you always see at extreme games,” he mused. “I could be the face of ‘Super Soaker Robberies’—it could be a whole new trend!” Onlookers, however, were not as convinced. “I mean, we get it, times are tough and we’ve all thought about robbing a store when we’re really craving junk food,” said one witness. “But this is taking gaming a little too far. Who even brings a water gun to a snack raid?” As of now, the city plans to hold a community meeting themed “Games Gone Wrong” to discuss where adults might be going astray with their childhood fantasies. Meanwhile, Thompson remains behind bars, where there are no toy water guns allowed, leaving him to contemplate his next great escape from reality.