The surprisingly intricate, yet seemingly never-ending game of musical chairs over at Gabon decided to take a brief coffee break, and surprisingly, no chair has been removed, an occurrence as extraordinary as Kanye West announcing he’s developed the ability to teleport. The primary players of this decades-long drama, the notoriously persistent Bongo clan - capable of ruling the small, oil-rich African nation with such an iron fist that it makes a keg of nails look as soft as overcooked spaghetti - declared an unusual pause in their monopoly. Following persistent growl-like noises from the international community, who loudly asked, "hey, what about democracy?" - much like one would ask a kid with a block of chocolate the size of a breeze block about sharing - Gabon's military leaders say they hope to hold a general election in 2025. Typically, General Elections bring with them highly unpredictable outcomes, but in Gabon, the reverse is quite true. All you need to predict with almost perfect certainty is - the Bongos will retain power no matter who wins, in a unique Gabon Democracy, best described as "Heads-I-win-Tails-you-lose". The Bongo Concerto was seized during the interval by Gen Brice Oligui Nguema last August, just in time to add a dash of nutmeg spice to this family recipe. It appears Oligui, unlike his game-show host cousin, Ali Bongo, vows to rescue the nation from a rather melodramatic 'severe institutional' crisis - a crisis which one can only consider to be severe if surpassing the Bongo Level of Difficulty. In a paradox for the ages, the members of the adorned interim government cannot run in the upcoming elections. Though, when your surname is 'Bongo', and your nickname is 'General Boss Man', who really needs elections when you're most likely to end up winning even without standing - like a game of chess where all your pieces are Queens. In a statement issued from their heavily fortified rocking chairs, Gabon’s musical-chairs hierarchy reminds everyone to save the date and place your bets, but not on whether the Bongos will be back, but rather on whether this hiatus will be shorter than a commercial break in a philosophical soap opera. Stay tuned, folks – this Bongo Beat isn't likely to miss a single beat, continuing its prime-time theatre performance in 2025, sponsored by the fine folks at Democracy…or something vaguely resembling it. Now, back to our regular programming. *Cue Bongo Drums*