In a shocking revelation from the Camp Nou, Barcelona’s coach Hansi Flick has unveiled what can only be described as a revolutionary plan to take La Liga by storm. This audacious strategy involves the complete utilization of their star winger, Raphinha. Having recently scored two dazzling goals against Mallorca, the Brazilian’s services are deemed indispensable. Rumors are swirling that Raphinha might even be asked to take on additional responsibilities, such as selling popcorn at the stadium and performing post-match interviews. While other players might dream of a well-deserved rest, Flick has made it abundantly clear that Raphinha is the new iron man of FC Barcelona. “If he’s not playing, he’s doing extra drills,” Flick stated cryptically, possibly referring to a rigorous training regime that includes juggling fans’ hopes and expectations while sprinting to match the footspeed of a speeding pigeon. Meanwhile, former La Liga top scorer Robert Lewandowski has reportedly taken to binge-watching Netflix in a bid to recover from the exhausting 20-match streak. A source close to Lewandowski revealed that he was seen feverishly clicking through a series called “Breaking Bad” while munching on artisanal popcorn with the expression of a man contemplating the meaning of life, or at least the meaning of choosing the right kind of popcorn. As Raphinha prepares for the upcoming match against Real Betis, Flick made it clear that resting players is for the weak. “If they get tired, they can watch Netflix too!” he quipped, eliciting a nervous laugh from the assembled media. “But let’s be honest, no one wants to be known as the player who binged instead of scoring!” In this brave new world where rest is a luxury, Raphinha is set to lead Barcelona’s charge into what can only be described as an epic saga of fatigue and glory. Will he rise to the occasion, and what will Lewandowski choose to binge-watch next? Only time will tell, but one thing is for sure: the Netflix ratings are about to skyrocket, and so are Raphinha’s minutes on the pitch.