In a dazzling display of politicking that rivals a circus act, the Free Democrats (FDP) have decided that nothing says "we're a united coalition" quite like throwing their own economic summit on the same day as Chancellor Scholz’s big powwow with business groups. It’s clear that the FDP is tired of being the wallflower at the governmental dance, and what better way to grab attention than to crash a party they weren’t even invited to? Chancellor Olaf Scholz, assuming he could have a cozy conversation about the economy with business leaders without interruptions, clearly didn’t get the memo that the FDP was ready to party. Reports suggest that Senator Lindner, the mastermind behind this bold move, felt that attending the Chancellor’s meeting would be akin to watching paint dry. Instead, he’s opted for a summit where they can dictate the agenda, or at the very least, bring their own snacks. Sources close to the FDP say the summit will feature thrilling discussions on economic policy, lively debates on the price of pretzels, and a keynote address titled "How to Make Everyone Else Look Bad While Claiming You Care." Insiders are whispering that the dress code will be "business casual" with an emphasis on looking more serious than the Chancellor’s meeting—whatever that entails. Meanwhile, Scholz appears unfazed, widely regarded as the calm center in this swirling tornado of coalition drama. Insiders describe his reaction to the FDP move as "relieved," claiming he’s finally got an excuse to eat his lunch in peace without capitalist voices interrupting him over coffee. “At least no one will be fighting over who gets to present the latest PowerPoint slides,” one aide said, under the condition of anonymity, fearing for their own standing in the grey abyss of coalition politics. Political analysts are pondering the symbolic implications of this maneuver, wondering if the FDP is positioning itself as the lone wolf in a coalition packed with cuddly bears. Observers expect the summit to be broadcast live—offering prime viewing for anyone who enjoys watching a slow-motion train wreck, as the FDP try to woo business leaders on their own terms. As the event approaches, both meetings are set to take place amid flashes of camera bulbs, with speculation running rampant about who will come out on top: the cozy chats of Scholz or the extravagant theatrics of Lindner. One thing is certain: the German economic future might be hanging in the balance, but it will certainly be entertaining to watch the coalition partners try to one-up each other—bubble tea in hand or not. So grab your popcorn, folks! It seems that in German politics, where the economy is taking a nosedive, the only thing anyone can agree on is that drama, like a well-timed economic policy, is best served fresh and piping hot.