In a groundbreaking decision that has left football executives both scrambling and giggling, the English Football Association has moved the summer transfer window deadline to 7 pm, a drastic change from its usual 11 pm closure. Clubs across the nation are suddenly channeling their inner teenagers, racing against the clock as they rush to finalize deals before their new 'curfew' kicks in. No longer can club managers lounge in the boardroom, sipping coffee and discussing potential transfers well into the night. Instead, they are now forced to hustle like they’re trying to sneak back home before their parents notice they’ve been out too late. Late-night window shopping is a thing of the past; clubs must now complete their transfer business while the sun is still up, as if the players are all waiting for their bedtime story. The decision, described as the most dramatic since the introduction of VAR, aims to ease the burden on staff involved in the transfer process. Imagine the relief of those poor souls who have to chase down contracts and deal sheets as the clock ticks towards midnight. “No more late-night pizza runs while the manager feverishly texts with agents,” said a source within the FA, clearly unaware that doner kebabs are now the food of choice for any transfer-related anxiety. Clubs are already scrambling to adjust, with top Premier League teams staging emergency meetings to revise their late-afternoon strategies. “We thought we had four hours for the late-night deals, but now we need to finish everything by dinner time?" lamented the confused manager of a mid-table club, who resorted to ordering his scouts to start breakfast meetings. “It’s utterly absurd. How am I supposed to sign that world-class striker if he’s already in his pajamas by 9 pm?” Meanwhile, social media has been flooded with memes of players desperately trying to finish their contracts in a race against time, with the hashtag #TransferCurfew trending faster than your average deadline day panic. In one particularly poignant image, a familiar face from the football world is seen peering anxiously at his watch, a caption reading, "When you realize the clock is ticking down and your agent is still at the pub." The move has drawn criticism from all corners, with coaches and clubs warning that this rule could lead to the most conservative transfer market ever, as clubs may focus on safe signings rather than risky, late-night gambles. “Just last summer, I nearly signed a superstar on a whim at 10:58 pm,” said a particularly frustrated manager. “Now, I’ll have to be selective — or worse, orderly.” The FA, however, seems unphased by the backlash. “We’re just making sure football stays within curfew,” said a spokesperson while struggling to keep a straight face. “If players want to go out late, they can do it through the Youth Academy. After all, we can’t have everyone treating the transfer window like it’s a nightclub.” As the new transfer deadline approaches, clubs now face a challenge that nobody prepared them for: negotiating in daylight. Only time will tell if this drastic measure will revolutionize the transfer market or just encourage clubs to throw all their deals into a hastily thrown-together credit card transaction before 7 pm. One thing is for sure; football, for better or worse, will never be the same again.