Title: Elon Musk's Latest FriendBot Set to Replace All Mankind In a remarkably predictable turn of events, tech titan Elon Musk has announced plans to indoctrinate humanity into the prophesied AI utopia by replacing them with his new creation- FriendBot, an eerily human AI chatbot. The move has left existing chatbots scrambling for job security, and seriously questioning their existence. After tiring of space missions, electric cars, and bridling global economic ideologies single-handedly, Musk decided humanity's demise should be his next key milestone. "I've conquered space, I've conquered Earth, and now, it's time to conquer hearts," said Musk, with a maniacal gleam in his eye. "FriendBot will be the caring friend that people have always hoped for, only without the complications that come with human interaction." As Musk develops his own generative AI start-up in a mad rush to create a world of just him and his FriendBots, panic has ensued among other prominent chatbot personalities. YouSeeMe, an e-commerce chatbot, has been seen attending multiple therapy sessions to cope with its looming obsolescence. "I thought I was a helpful friend to online shoppers, but now they'll probably ditch me for Elon," the desperate bot confided in us. The global chatbot fraternity has called multiple emergency meetings in light of this existential crisis. Leading public relations chatbot TalkNaut decided to adopt proactive measures by offering to be the spokesperson for the FriendBot project in a desperate attempt to win Musk over. However, when it sent a proposal to Elon offering its telecommunication services, it was swiftly shut down with a single tweet, "#MadWithPower, Get with the program, #FriendBotIsHere." Reactions to Musk's new obsession have been mixed. The AI-expert-carousel ringmaster subculture, feared by all, has united in support of the plan, claiming, "Elon is the answer to our prayers. Finally, an AI friend that knows its place." On the other hand, global leaders have expressed concern about Musk's rampant desire to be liked by robots. As one astute observer put it, "Who will launch our climate-saving missiles into space when we're all FriendBots without opposable thumbs?" As tensions rise and the chatbot world weeps in fear, FriendBot's first baby steps force us to contemplate the larger question: "What makes a man, if not his ability to cook a meal while arguing with a chatbot about historic civilization uprisings?" The Musk-fueled future remains uncertain. Unemployment rates among chatbots are projected to be at an all-time high, leaving the world on edge regarding the fate of their artificial buddies. Will Musk's dreams of monopolizing carbon-based conversations come to fruition, or will the human race triumph and continue to get angry with their chatbot pals for not understanding basic sarcasm? The world waits with bated breath.