In shocking news that’s leaping around the world, Australia has just decided to bring the kangaroo population back into the circle of life by recycling them for an ambitious project along the Great Dividing Range. "I know what you may be thinking," said Cletus Dingo, Minister of the Department of Things That Hop, "Why in the bloody hell did we decide on kangaroos? But truth is mate, we just have way too many kangaroos! You can't take two steps without accidentally stepping on a joey's tail." The newly implemented "Kangaroo Refurbishment Scheme" intends to provide everyday Australians with much-needed relief from kangaroo-created chaos, which includes such horrors as frequent 'roo raids' on veggie gardens and inexplicable bouts of boxing between kangaroos and touring British nationals. Australians across the country are thrilled at the idea of getting these pesky kangaroos out of their backyards and into the lush greenery of the Great Dividing Range. One Sydneysider noted, "I reckon it's about bloody time. Tried having a barby the other day and outta nowhere this kangaroo hops up and starts nicking the shrimp." The scheme, set to begin implementation next month, revolves around developing eco-friendly methods for transporting tired 'roos from populated cities to areas within the Great Dividing Range. The high-profile plan has been jovially dubbed "Operation Boomerang". When asked about the cost of this program, Dingo humorously responded, "You know, it's not that steep. We're saving up on costs by simply loading them up in our pouches. Figured it'd be nice to give 'em a taste of their own medicine." But not everyone is happy with this new plan. PETA, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, voiced their concern. "We fear this recycling scheme could lead to a kangaroo population boom, which could destroy the ecosystem," says PETA spokesperson, Uproar McScreech. In response to PETA's concerns, Mr. Dingo quipped, "Ecosystems are like dinner plates. A bit too many kangaroo sausages, chips, and porridge, it becomes too full. But clear some plates and you have room for more jackaroo pies! Trust us, we've got it covered!" Local kangaroos refused to comment on the situation, instead choosing to chew on some leaves and stare blankly into the distance. Whether this ploy by the Australian government to recycle kangaroos settles the 'roocide' problem or catapults it forward in a bizarre twist of fate, only time will tell. But until then, all we can do is watch, perhaps with a sandwich in hand, as the world Down Under takes on a revitalized and kangaroo-focused approach to life. Stay tuned for more updates on “Operation Boomerang” as it’s also rumoured that koalas are being considered for future schemes. Will someone please remind Dingo that koalas aren't actual bears and you can't ride them? They’re herbivorous marsupials! In the meantime, Aussie Aussie Aussie!”