"Escapism in Style", Shouts Dak Prescott as Super Bowl Prices Skyrocket Dallas, TX - Cowboy’s quarterback, Dak Prescott, in a shocking transformation from gunslinging cowboy to contemplative monk, has announced his plans for a "monastic retreat" this February. The unexpected spiritual journey coincides neatly with the astronomical Super Bowl LVIII ticket prices looming over football fans nationwide. Prescott, visibly relieved by the self-imposed social isolation tactic, cited the "universally accepted truth of tranquility through transcendental meditation over consumerism," as the driving force for his decision. Sources close to the gifted quarterback confirmed his increasing interest in Zen Buddhism, chakra balancing, and the art of growing bonsai trees. These spiraling costs for Super Bowl attendance certainly make his newfound affinity for asceticism seem timely. In an absurd world where Super Bowl tickets now run a fan about $9,000, reportedly excluding applicable sales tax, your Zen garden starts to look pretty attractive. Upon hearing the lavish costs, routine patrons can be found carrying out elaborate recalculation exercises. Standard logistics such as a 17 and a half-hour drive, or a $205 flight to Vegas, are followed by wrestling with the staggering $500 per night Vegas hotel rates during the second week of February. Economic speculators have begun arguing that this sudden spike in Prescott's interest in a simpler, economical lifestyle could soon transform into a nationwide trend. Football fans, beleaguered with ludicrously priced tickets, may soon find themselves chanting "Om" in the living room rather than cheering in the stands. Prescott's plans have emboldened the defense of the Cowboys, who say they're ready to "play for two" with the quarterback taking his remarkable 'leave of absence' during the sport’s biggest event. They're already imagining a serene Dak, cloaked in a simple cotton robe, sending them positive vibes from his Zen garden. To the fans suffering a mild financial heart attack at the sight of the Super Bowl prices, Prescott offered some comfort, “I'll tell ya what, y'all stay home, fire up the grill, and enjoy the game in your own peace. Heck, come join me, let’s turn this into a retreat tradition.” Sports analyst, Max Kellerman, suggesting a deep-seated conspiracy, commented on the peculiar timing of Prescott's retreat, “It's like he's hoping to avoid having to make excuses if the Cowboys don't make it to the Super Bowl.” As Prescott's spiritual journey takes shape and Super Bowl prices reach orbits, cash-strapped Cowboys’ fans now face the philosophical question - To 'Om or 'Home', that is the question.