In a bold move that has set the academic world abuzz, several elite French universities have announced a new tuition structure that combines the joys of pastry with the prestige of a degree, affectionately dubbed the "Croissant Credential Program." For a mere €50,000 per year, students can now enroll in the latest trend in higher education: a degree that is worth its weight in buttery dough. The program's tagline, “Grab a croissant, grab a degree,” perfectly encapsulates the trend of boujee education where students sacrifice both their savings and their dignity in the pursuit of education flavored with an undeniable hint of Parisian charm. Proponents of the program tout its "hands-on" learning experience: students are required to consume at least four croissants a day while attending lectures on existential philosophy, fashion design, and, of course, the art of perfecting the “le regard nonchalant” (the nonchalant look). “Our mission is simple,” states the university’s Dean of Croissants, who requested to remain anonymous due to the secretive nature of their elite pastry program. “We want to ensure our graduates don’t just leave with a degree, but with the unequivocal ability to pair it with a perfect pain au chocolat. Because let’s face it: what is a degree without flaky layers and warm chocolate?” Critics of the program argue that it's an elaborate scheme designed to fleece the wealthy elite of their trust funds while simultaneously adding a layer of pretentiousness to the already absurd concept of credentialism. “I mean, what’s next? A degree in baguette performance art? Isn’t it bad enough that students are drowning in student loans for degrees they’ll never use?” scoffs an anonymous former academic, currently working as a barista in a café that features degree-holding clientele more interested in Instagramming their brunch than launching careers. But it seems the allure of chic education has captivated the masses. Enrollment for the second year of the Croissant Credential Program is skyrocketing, with wealthy parents reportedly setting up GoFundMe pages to collect money for their children's academic aspirations. “I just want my child to experience the kind of education that comes with a side of béchamel sauce,” one eager parent lamented while trying to discreetly brush off crumbs from their designer handbag. In an added twist, the program also includes an optional module on “Networking Over Nougat,” where students learn the ins and outs of mingling with France’s elite, all while practicing their best *à la française* twirl of a crêpe. Graduates of the program will not only emerge with a degree but also an extensive collection of social media followers eager to vicariously experience their glamorous lives filled with café-hopping and rooftop dinner parties. Meanwhile, student protestors have emerged, waving molded croissants as signs against the rising cost of education. “We want real degrees, not just ‘flaky’ ones!” they chanted, their resolve weakening as they ingested the very pastries they intended to protest against. As France continues to redefine the world of higher education, one thing is clear: it’s only a matter of time before universities start selling degrees by the dozen, packaged with a side of carefully curated Instagram feed. And for those willing to pay the price, the boujee experience awaits, as long as they’re willing to chew through a few crusts along the way.