Title: Celtics Gifted Apathy Pool Float, Rejoice as Gabe Vincent Out for Game 5 The Boston Celtics are elated after receiving an early Christmas gift in the form of Miami Heat's Gabe Vincent being out for Game 5 due to an ankle sprain. Sources say that the entire Celtics lineup threw an impromptu party filled with games of pin the tail on the donkey and pizza this morning. Head coach of the Boston team, Brad Stevens, couldn't contain his joy when asked about the news. "I mean, sure, Gabe Vincent averages 2.1 points per game and has no direct impact on our team, but I can't help but feel blessed to not have to see his face on the bench tonight." The Celtics are expected to set up an inflatable pool filled with a mixture of apathy and celebration in front of the Heat bench, making sure that they don't miss the opportunity to remind everyone of their massive 'advantage.' When asked for his thoughts on the shocking absence, Celtics' point guard Marcus Smart responded, "Who's Gabe Vincent?" The entire roster, team officials, and several confused reporters joined together in a group prayer session today, thanking the lord for making this awe-inspiring injury happen at just the right time in the series. They all agreed that Gabe Vincent's presence would have most likely altered the course of the NBA playoffs and potentially the entire fabric of space-time. In the meantime, Gabe Vincent was seen at a local arcade, spending his newfound free time setting high scores on House of the Dead and Dance Dance Revolution. When asked if he was upset about missing Game 5, Vincent replied, "Oh, was that tonight? Huh, neat." Game 5 between the Miami Heat and the Boston Celtics will tip-off this evening, as millions tune in to see the impact of Gabe Vincent's absence.