In a display of unprecedented emotions usually reserved for soap operas and viral cat videos, Angelina Jolie transformed into a human raincloud at the Venice Film Festival during the premiere of her film "Maria." Witnesses report that when the credits rolled and the applause erupted, Jolie didn’t just tear up; she appeared to momentarily consider a career change to become a professional leaky faucet. The thunderous applause lasted so long it was rumored that festival officials had to issue an emergency announcement to remind the audience that they had indeed seen a movie and not just a recording of a cat attempting to play the piano. As applause reached heights typically reserved for rock stars, Jolie, who has previously been untouchable on the emotional scale, was seen dabbing at her eyes, causing some in attendance to wonder if the film had a surprise storyline involving a puppy rescue. Director Pablo Larraín and the cast joined Jolie, but it was clear she was the main event—not only because of her gravity-defying talent but because the theater had to hire a team of lifeguards stationed at the front to combat the tears cascading from the actress, creating a scene reminiscent of a low-budget disaster movie. As celebrities gathered to offer support, many took to social media to post heartfelt tributes, with one notable star claiming, “If Angelina cried, I cried because obviously that’s how emotions work!” Reports of a nearby fashion designer sketching swimwear for the rainy occasion soon surfaced, proving that in Hollywood, even tearful moments can lead to lucrative opportunities. In the aftermath of the screening, fans and critics alike pondered the deeper implications of Jolie's tears. Was it the profound connection she felt to the film? Was it the sheer joy of being back on the red carpet? Or had she finally realized how much she missed her days of simple emotional manipulation on set? Whatever the reason, Jolie’s emotional moment at the Venice Film Festival is being hailed as a transformative experience—both for her and for anyone who has ever wished they could turn their feelings into a full-body monsoon. The actress later assured fans that she would be “fine” as long as “the floodgates were kept in check.” As John Cleese would say, “And now for something completely different!”—like an actual raincoat and an umbrella, the new must-have accessories on the red carpet!