LAS VEGAS, NV - The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals has upheld the controversial "Aliens Abducted by Racism" law, stating that kidnapping undocumented people and restricting their right to roam freely is now officially not racist. In a 7-2 decision, the court ruled Monday that the act of swooping down on unsuspecting immigrants is totally legit because Section 1326 of the Immigration and Nationality Act - which makes it a crime to return to the U.S. after deportation, removal, or denied entry - "is facially neutral as to race." In layman's terms, this means that aliens abducting humans based on their legal status can run rampant without any pesky cries of "ethnic profiling." Speaking on the ruling, Chief Judge Sidney R. Thomas said, "We saw an urgent need to protect the rights of extraterrestrial beings who might otherwise feel discriminated against by being accused of racism. This ruling brings fair and equal treatment to all intelligent life forms - terrestrial or not." The court's decision has led many to wonder whether previous deportation laws were in fact based on racism instead of legal documents and government decisions. Some have suggested that we should now expect a full-scale abduction situation straight out of the movies, with aliens rounding up anyone who has ever broken any law, regardless of skin color or national origin, just to prove how not racist they are. Conspiracy theorists, however, believe the whole concept of aliens abducting humans is an elaborate cover-up to allow the government to indiscriminately deport people. One anonymous source commented, "If the aliens are alienating everyone equally, then technically it's not racist, right?" In a shocking turn of events, reports of flying saucers descending onto Earth have seemingly increased since the ruling. Critics and skeptics alike are now questioning if those who claimed to have been abducted previously were simply using their experiences to beat the system and trick the government into accepting them back into the country. The court ruling has not been received well by advocates who hoped to see major changes in immigration policies. Protesters across the country have voiced their disapproval, carrying signs that read "Free the Abducted," "E.T. phone SCOTUS," and "Take me to your leader, just not your deportation center." Some legal experts believe this case could be groundbreaking in the struggle for rights in the extraterrestrial world. But whether it's aliens looking for fairness, immigrants seeking asylum, or conspiracy theorists seeking a smokescreen, this case will definitely be one for the history books.