In a highly anticipated press conference held in a room filled with eager reporters, President-elect Donald Trump once again unveiled his grand vision for international trade, likening the complexities of U.S.-India trade relations to an intricate dance routine. Unfortunately, many in attendance were left wondering if they were watching a delicate waltz or an awkward shuffle. “Listen folks, if India wants to play the tariff game, we’ll just have to dance our own tango,” Trump declared, emphasizing his newfound love for Latin rhythms as well as reciprocal taxes. “It’s simple: they tax us, we tax them. They tax us again, and we tax them back. It’s like a complicated ‘Hot Potato’ game, but with taxes and tariffs instead of potatoes. Or are they sweet potatoes? Either way, let me tell you, folks, they’re high in carbs, just like their taxes!” The president-elect had previously referred to India as the “tariff king," an unexpected title for a country renowned for its rich culture and spicy cuisine. However, Trump is undeterred, claiming that as long as India’s tariffs remain high, the U.S. will conveniently pick up the price tab with its own taxes—because what’s trade without a little friendly fire? “Look, if I’m going to get taxed like it’s my birthday every day, then I’ll have balloons and cake, and boy, am I going to make sure India feels the party too!” Trump continued, clearly in the mood to mix metaphors. “Imagine us at a dance-off: one wrong move and we both step on each other’s toes until we both need new shoes!” Reports suggest that Trump's administration may soon enlist Justin Timberlake or Beyoncé to choreograph this metaphorical trade tango, ensuring that both nations know the proper steps to avoid embarrassing missteps. When asked whether negotiations with India would involve colorful costumes or dance-offs, Trump hinted: “All options are on the table, folks! But if it takes a good old-fashioned dance-off to show them we mean business, so be it!” Economists and political analysts around the world raised their eyebrows as the implications of Trump’s newfound obsession with dance-related tariffs began to sink in. “This could disrupt the global trade stage as we know it,” one economist noted, while another quipped, “If Trump thinks this is a good idea, I fully expect him to issue official dance uniforms for the occasion.” As negotiations loom, Indian officials have expressed their concern. “We prefer to keep our toes intact,” said one spokesperson, “but we might consider sending over some Bollywood choreography to lighten the mood. After all, everyone loves a good dance number!" In the meantime, global markets continue to flinch in anticipation of being swept off their feet or, perhaps more accurately, on their toes in this trade dance competition that seems set to go viral—not just for the world economy, but also for reality TV moments to come.