In a stunning revelation, two hitmen discovered that the career of a contract killer is, in fact, not all it's cracked up to be. Jose Lopez, 26, and Tanner Fox, 24, both walked into B.C. Supreme Court expecting a walk in the park—but instead left with life sentences without the possibility of parole for 20 years. It turns out that when it comes to murder for hire, there’s a lot more to it than just a fanciful daydream of becoming a "hired gun." "I thought there would at least be a Pinterest board for tips," Lopez lamented, still wearing the crisp black suit he’d chosen to impress the judge. “I mean, how hard can it be to take someone out? I watched all the movies! It looked so easy on screen!” His family sat quietly behind him, likely questioning their decision to attend this questionable career choice celebration. The duo had pleaded guilty to the second-degree murder of Ripudaman Singh Malik, a former Air India bombing suspect. Malik might not have been a particularly easy target—after all, he had quite the history—but Lopez and Fox were undeterred. “They don’t teach you about 'due diligence' in hitman school,” Fox chimed in with a hint of sarcasm in his voice. “I thought it just involved a cool getaway car and a mask.” But alas, it seems these aspiring assassins had underestimated the importance of planning. "I mean, we literally Googled 'How to be a hitman', and all we got were ads for pest control services," Lopez complained. "No one told us it would end with life sentences!” Legal experts speculate this case might just inspire a new trend in career guidance. "Parents across the region may want to rethink their children’s aspirations if they were considering a future in contract killing," said one witty analyst. “Perhaps they should focus on accounting or something with less, shall we say, incarceration risk?" In a surprise twist, the judge was reportedly contemplating offering the pair a workshop titled "Killing Careers: Where Did You Go Wrong?" as part of their rehabilitation, joking that it might serve as a cautionary tale to future wannabe hitmen. “The world needs better hitmen,” the judge quipped. “At the very least, get some training on how to not get caught!” While the world may not have its next great assassins, it does have two fellas who fortified the idea that every career comes with its challenges—especially when you decide to take someone's life for a living.