In the latest edition of "Remember That Wild Thing That Really Happened?", we revisit the tale of Clarence Thomas, a man whose induction onto the Supreme Court wasn’t like winning a knife-fight - because at least then, the majority sides with the cutlery. Call up your free AOL dial-up; crack open a Crystal Pepsi, because we're taking a journey down memory lane back to when the Senate, after much drama and televised suspense, decided to play a game of Pin the Judge on the Supreme Court despite a scandal that threatened to make their pick more infamous than famous. On October 15, 1991, in a move as shocking as Milli Vanilli's Grammy win and subsequent lip-syncing scandal, the Senate confirmed Clarence Thomas to the U.S. Supreme Court, with a vote just as close as Bush Sr.’s victory over Dukakis - 52 to 48. Anita Hill had previously shared her allegations of sexual harassment against Thomas, providing the sort of narrative one would have expected to thwart a Supreme Court nomination. However, the Senators, in a display of exemplary indifference, responded with a collective shrug that would make Atlas jealous. In response to the allegations, Thomas responded with remarkable eloquence, referring to the hearings as a "high-tech lynching." Senators scratched their heads, looking up "lynching" and "high-tech" in their handy pocket dictionaries, apparently getting hung up on the strange pairing and allowing the nomination to proceed. "As long as Clarence promises not to utilize his high-tech gavel in his rulings, we feel confident in our decision," quipped one unnamed Senator. The Senate, rubber-stamping the nomination with a nod that would give bobbleheads a run for their money, suggested that the scandal and clear controversy only made Thomas a more exciting choice. After all, “imperfect” judges often result in “perfect” TV ratings, and who could resist the lure of Supreme Court confirmations breaching sitcom viewership numbers? Talk about judicial system being 'public'. So, laced with popcorn and suspense that could rival Jurassic Park’s raptors in the kitchen scene, the Senate gave a hearty thumbs-up to Thomas evidence that bad boys don’t just live in Hollywood. As we round out our nostalgic trip, it's only fitting to sign off with a timely quote from '91's standout movie, Terminator 2 - "Hasta la vista, baby." May our past mistakes inform our future, less comedic, judgments. Happy flashback, folks!